This is a real-life example of the communication differences between men and women. Below is my experience in labour and delivery. I know women across the globe appreciate and crave the details. Men, on the other hand, want to know if everyone is happy and healthy. They thrive on information and knowledge that is to the point.
“Our baby’s birth story:
The first four paragraphs are for the ladies. Men, please see the last sentence of the last paragraph.
We welcomed our little bundle of joy on August 21st, 4:30 pm, at the Sturgeon Hospital in Edmonton after 26hrs of active labour. Fortunately for us, we had a prenatal appointment in Edmonton on the morning of the 20th and decided to stay the weekend just in case. At approximately 3:30 in the afternoon on the 20th, my water broke, not a full break, just a tear to indicate things were starting. We called the doula to give her a heads up. The plan was to labour at a hotel for as long as possible and then make the hospital’s short drive.
The hospital wants women in labour to be admitted within 12 hours of a water break, so we left the hotel around 2:30 am and was admitted and in a room by 3:30 am. I was only about 4cm dilated at this point. The labour pains were kicking into gear, so I retreated to the shower, finding some relief. It was dark, warm, and it provided me with some comfort. As the intensity and exhaustion ramped up, I was unfortunately only 6 cm dilated. I had a long way to go. I remember looking at the clock around 6 am and realizing I wasn’t going to be able to do it all on my own. I wanted an epidural. I was getting intense back labour, and it felt like my spine was shattering every 5 minutes.
I choose to wait for the daytime anesthesiologist, which meant he didn’t arrive till 7:30 am. The head nurse gave me a play-by-play account of his movements: arrival, parking, and scrubs on. All the while, the minutes passed painfully. It took every last ounce of energy to wait until 8 am to get the numbing juice. I needed rest.
I thankfully slept for a couple of hours, and upon waking around 10:30 am, it was time to recheck dilation. I was sitting at 9 cm! My body was able to relax enough with the epidural that I was progressing. I was rechecked each hour for the next 2, and unfortunately, there was no progress. The decision was made to administer Pitocin. I had Pitocin for about 2 hours when I finally reached the green light go, 10 cms. At around 2:30 pm, it was time to push. I pushed for 2 hours before the little nugget made her entrance into the world. Our bundle of joy arrived weighing in at 7lbs 4 oz and 20 inches long.
We thank the stars above that our little Zoe bear is happy and healthy.”
Any man reading this blog, I guarantee you, is laughing because this example is painfully true.
Where in your life have you been providing too many details when getting to the point was necessary?
OMG! This is soooo funny! YES….women want the first 4 paragraphs. Every detail is interesting. And men only want the last sentence of the last paragraph. BUT…..get them going on a subject they are passionate about and they can (for example) spend forever detailing the workings of a Model T Ford engine! And all I want to hear about that is it is running smoothly!
Absolutely Marie! That’s why awareness of when and where detail should be conveyed becomes important. Do we have the right audience? I wouldn’t want to be bored with Model T Ford engine details any more than most men want to hear the labour and delivery story!